(41 - 50) Life of a householder

இல்லறவியல்/ GRHASTHA DHARMA

(Householder’s Duties)

இல்வாழ்க்கை

IL VAAZHKAI

LIFE OF A HOUSEHOLDER

INTRODUCTION

The life of a man is divided into four stages by the ancient scriptures – celibacy (student-life), Grhastha (householder), Vaanaprastha (Retirement to forests), and Sanyaasa (life of reunciation.

Herein is described the disciplines that a householder should follow.

(41)

  இல்வாழ்வான் என்பான் இயல்புடைய மூவர்க்கும்

நல்லாற்றின் நின்ற துணை

ILVAAZVAAN ENBAAN IYALBUDAIYA MOOVARKKUM

NALLARRIN NINRA THUNAI

A person who runs the household

stays as the support -

for the three (parents, wife, and children) who are by nature under his care-

in their well being.

(A Young man, after completing his education enters the station of  the Householder, 'Grhastha'-  one who is the ruler of the house; one who is responsible for all those who live in the house – his parents, his wife, his (future) children, cows, dogs, servants , plants, and all.

A marriage is not gone though just for enjoying a conjugal relationship with a woman. It is not done for monetary benefits also.

A marriage is to propagate good children; give them good education and make them good members of the society by oneself becoming the ideal model of perfection.

The old parents need to be served and taken care of; for they took care of a person when one was a helpless infant.

A wife who walks seven steps around the fire, holding the man’s hand vows to support her husband in all his duties towards parents, children and society. She has renounced her kith and kin to become an equal partner in the duties that are ordained by the scriptures for a householder. She is to be treated with love.

A householder ‘must’ care for the well-being all these three, parents; wife; and children.)

(42)

துறந்தார்க்கும் துவ்வா தவர்க்கும் இறந்தார்க்கும்

இல்வாழ்வான் என்பான் துணை

 THURANDAARKKUM TUVVAATHAVARKKUM IRANDAARKKUM

ILVAAZVAAN ENBAAN TUNAI

A householder is the support

for those who have taken to the life of renunciation,

for those who lack food,

and for those who are dead.

(A householder does not live only for the maintenance of the limited circle of his family.

He as an earning member of the society has to contribute some share of his income to the Sages who have renounced everything in search of Supremacy; those unfortunate members of the society who do not even have the basic amenity of food; and the close relations of a person who has had untimely death.)

(43)

தென்புலத்தார் தெய்வம் விருந்தொக்கல் தானென்றாங்கு

ஐம்புலத்தா றோம்பல் தலை

 THENPULATTAAR DAIVAM VIRUNDOKKAL THAANENRAANGU

AIMPULATTHAARU OMBAL THALAI

Attending properly to the duties towards these five, namely

those who live in the south, the deity, guests, relatives, himself,

is the primary task (of the householder).

(A married man is obliged to serve these five categories of people definitely.

He must regularly offer oblations to the manes (reside in Southern direction, the country of Yama), in their remembrance.

He has to offer worship to the deity who protects him and his family from calamities.

He must serve the guests who arrive at his house with love and affection as if they are Gods visiting his humble home.

He must participate in the happiness and sorrow of his relatives and maintain good relationship with all.

Last of all, he must think about himself also. He must strive for intellectual pursuits; develop his particular talents; keep his body healthy; should not give way to vices and invite an untimely death.)

(44)

பழியஞ்சிப் பாத்தூண் உடைத்தாயின் வாழ்க்கை

வழியெஞ்சல் எஞ்ஞான்றும் இல

PAZHIYANJIP PAATTHOON UDAITHAAYIN VAAZKAI

VAZHIYENJCAL ENJJAANRUM ILA

In the life of a householder,

who acquires blameless wealth and shares it with others,

there will never be the cessation of progeny.

(A married man who acquires wealth through honest means and who shares it with the needy will never accumulate sins and so will not suffer ever the cessation of his progeny. Having healthy habits of the mind and body, he will have healthy intelligent sons and daughters; and will make his family have continuous progeny because of his merits.)

(45)

அன்பும் அறனும் உடைத்தாயின் இல்வாழ்க்கை

பண்பும் பயனும் அது

ANBUM ARANUM UDAITTHAAYIN ILVAAZKAI

PANPUM PAYANUM ADU

If the house-holder’s life is filled with love and Righteousness,

then it will be excellent and worthy.

(A married man should be kind and loving towards all. He must do actions which are Dhaarmic or righteous. Then only his life will be excellent and become a valuable part of the society.)

(46)

அறத்தாற்றின் இல்வாழ்க்கை ஆற்றின் புறத்தாற்றில்

போஒய்ப் பெறுவ தெவன்

 ARATTHAARRIN ILVAAZKAI AARRIN PURATTHAARRIL

PO OYP PERUVATHEVAN

If a person leads his householder life

by performing his ordained duties well,

what more is there to achieve for him,

by following other paths?

(A married man need not do penance, he need not visit holy centers. His house itself is a temple; and his regular selfless duties themselves become equal to penance.

What a Yogi attains by penance and renunciation- that -a man of the house attains by just regularly performing duties in a righteous manner.)

(47)

இயல்பினான் இல்வாழ்க்கை வாழ்பவன் என்பான்

முயல்வாருள் எல்லாம் தலை

IYALBINAAN ILVAAZKAI VAAZBAVAN ENBAAN

MUYALVAARUL ELLAAM THALAI

If one lives his householder’s life in a natural way as prescribed,

he is the foremost of all those who strive for a good way of life.

(A married man’s life where he attends to his duties as ordained in the Dhaarmic scriptures, is the best on this earth.)

 (48)

ஆற்றின் ஒழுக்கி அறனிழுக்கா இல்வாழ்க்கை

நோற்பாரின் நோன்மை உடைத்து

AARRIN OZAKKI ARANIZAKKAA ILVAAZHKAI

NORPAARIN NONMAI UDAITTHU

Helping others in their way of life,

 yet if a person leads his house-holder’s life

without swerving from his Dharma,

then his life excels even the penance of the Sages.

 (A married man who lives the righteous way has the best of both lives; here and hereafter. Without physically renouncing anything, he still leads a life of renunciation, by selflessly serving his family and society.)

 (49)

அறன்எனப் பட்டதே இல்வாழ்க்கை அஃதும்

பிறன்பழிப்ப தில்லாயின் நன்று

ARAN ENAPPATTADE ILVAAZKAI A ஃTHUM

PIRANPAZHIPPA THILLAAYIN NANRU                                    

The householder’s life is a model of righteous way of life.

It indeed will be commendable,

 if it is led in such a way, that nobody finds a reason to blame.

(A married man’s life is worthy of praise if he truly lives his life according to the codes of Dharma and if he does actions which are flawless.)

(50)

வையத்துள் வாழ்வாங்கு வாழ்பவன் வான்உறையும்

தெய்வத்துள் வைக்கப் படும்

VAIYATTHUL VAAZVAANGU VAAZPAVAN VAAN URAIYUM

THAIVATTHUL VAIKKAPPADUM

He who lives his householder’s life in a proper way

will be esteemed as high as the God who dwells in heaven.

(A householder in the path of Dharma is a God on earth.)